Pain

My last post here was August.  A while ago....looking at how things change, eternity actually.  I have written about the dogs here numerous times and on that other site as well.  A brief update here.  Beulah, around Christmas time, began to drink copiously.  Being a former copious drinker myself, I didn't really pay attention to it, until two days in a row there was an accident in the house.  Unheard of for her.  A trip to the vet confirmed fears and she was diagnosed with diabetes.  In addition to this, a cataract was forming in one eye.  An injection daily of insulin would hopefully slow down progress, but within about 3 weeks, my best girl was completely blind.

If you have read my earlier stuff, you might assume that this would lead to her end.  It hasn't.  It may still, but not yet.  She has adapted unbelievably well.  She is still herself.  Happy, affectionate and smart.  My dad told me I should put her down.  I can't.  Not yet.  I told him that some people need seeing eye dogs.  Beulah needs seeing eye people.  She knows the house and only bumps into things when they are not as they were.  She finds her food and water.  She stands patiently for her daily shot and wags her tail when I praise her when it is complete.  She goes outside and follows me by listening for my footsteps.  She actually, to an extent, chases the ball still and will bring it back to my voice.  She finds it by ear and smell if I roll it past her not to far.  She wants to play with Karlie, but it ends up being too much for her.  That is the part that is heartbreaking.  She comes to my bedside and puts her paws up on the bed and licks my hand to go out in the night if she needs to.  I can't put her down yet.  She is still herself.  She loves us even if she can't see us and we still love her.

I put down Rascal two years ago in April.  It still bothers me, but she was 19 years old and could no longer walk.  I have put down many animals in my life and may be getting soft in my old age, but as long as Beulah is still there, I won't let an inconvenience to us be her end.

We rescued another dog, Brinley, from the shelter.  A three year old border collie mix who is very sweet and can play with Karlie and take the pressure off Beulah.  It has been working out well although some adaptation has been required.

Dogs are the best.  They give you everything unconditionally.  I know that the end will come for Beulah, as complications due to the diabetes go beyond the blindness.  I will be vigilant for her sake.  For now though I will be happy with what she can give.

Mark Twain wrote, "Heaven goes by favor.  If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in."